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The Real Story Revealed

Discussion in 'City Talk' started by Interested Bystander, Sep 26, 2018.

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  1. Interested Bystander

    Interested Bystander Important Player
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    In a startling revelation made today in German newspaper Gefälschte Nachrichten businessman Stefan Rupp claims that his purchase of Bradford City was an accident and that he was only in Bradford in 2014 for a few days as a tourist. My friends had been recommending that I visit this wonderful city but I had only a limited time said Rupp.

    Rupp continued: “There is a famous silk mill there called Lister's Mill, it’s famous all over the world I think with the chimney of the mill at 249 feet (76 m) high, and it can be seen from most areas of Bradford, and nearby is the equally famous mural to commemorate the centenary of the founding of the Independent Labour Party in Bradford in 1893. This I was most interested in as it is located in the Bradford Playhouse in an area called Little Germany,not to mention the nearby Law Russell warehouse (Lockwood & Mawson, 1874), where the portico is supported on crisply carved Corinthian columns of superb quality.

    Although I went on the first day to the Lister Mills it was slushy and raining and there was a hole in my shoe and I got wet so I went back to the hotel where I was staying".

    “The following day I did make it to The Bradford Playhouse and afterwards went into a local pub (Mais-Transportwagen I think it was called) to sample some English beer. Whilst there I met a friendly man called Mark and a few beers later he sold me his football club Bradford City AFC which he said was at the bottom of the hill in a valley. I didn’t know I was close to the ground but I thought this deal was OK anyway, so why not?

    I went back to Germany the following day, spoke to my friend Edin who knows football and he agreed to help and I didn’t think anymore of it but ever since then my life has been a nightmare and I have been wrongly accused of poisoning the Club.

    Now my life has been turned upside down and I don’t know what to do and where to go. I’m afraid of going out.

    I was just an innocent tourist in Bradford who has subsequently been falsely accused of doing things at Bradford which are so totally inconceivable that they would make no logical sense to anybody.

    In fact, I demand an apology from those who are really responsible for ruining the Bradford City Athletic Football Club and top of that list is someone who hides under the pseudonym Süd-Yorks Kleines Huhn
     
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    #1 Interested Bystander, Sep 26, 2018
    Jayteebee, Utters0, broadsword and 23 others like this.
  2. Fuzzy

    Fuzzy Impact Sub

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    Journalists investigating this story also found out that if you phone the employers phone number listed in his passport application form then someone answers it with the phrase "Good afternoon, Leeds United Football Club, how may I help you?"
     
    #2 Fuzzy, Sep 26, 2018
    Utters0, CT Bantam, Two Legs and 2 others like this.
  3. Ricky

    Ricky Squad Player
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    Considering he was at 3 city games before purchasing the club this is basically bullshit.
     
    #3 Ricky, Sep 26, 2018
    Interested Bystander and Onside like this.
  4. Interested Bystander

    Interested Bystander Important Player
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    **so funny
     
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    #4 Interested Bystander, Sep 26, 2018
    Utters0, marshy77, Bantam75 and 7 others like this.
  5. How

    How Knows Football
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    Have I missed the punchline?
     
    #5 How, Sep 26, 2018
    Dutchio and Onside like this.
  6. River_City_Bantam

    River_City_Bantam Squad Player
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    Good fishing today? Seem to have caught one already!

    RCB
     
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    #6 River_City_Bantam, Sep 26, 2018
    Haigysbarmybantam, Gardscoigne, Onside and 1 other person like this.
  7. Fuzzy

    Fuzzy Impact Sub

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    There's quite a meta element to this story when you consider how integral Wikipedia is to the average fan desperately trying to appear knowledgeable about a particular player/manager/club that is being discussed on a football forum.
     
    #7 Fuzzy, Sep 26, 2018
    Interested Bystander, Queenybantam and Onside like this.
  8. Toronto Bantam

    Toronto Bantam Youngster

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    Wow being a city fan has really killed your sense of humour lol
     
    #8 Toronto Bantam, Sep 26, 2018
    vanginger, Stoneski, CRASS and 4 others like this.
  9. Campbell's soup

    Campbell's soup Impact Sub
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    Bored or summat?
     
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    #9 Campbell's soup, Sep 26, 2018
    How and bantamlad92 like this.
  10. Interested Bystander

    Interested Bystander Important Player
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    Nope looking forward to our game tonight
     
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    #10 Interested Bystander, Sep 26, 2018
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  11. Campbell's soup

    Campbell's soup Impact Sub
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    You’ve missed the part about him still waiting for Red Bull to make an offer for the club ;)
     
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    #11 Campbell's soup, Sep 26, 2018
    Interested Bystander and Bantamsteve like this.
  12. Interested Bystander

    Interested Bystander Important Player
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    A major element I'd say
     
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    #12 Interested Bystander, Sep 26, 2018
  13. Ricky

    Ricky Squad Player
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    It has I see no light at the end of the tunnel were doomed I tell you doomed.
     
    #13 Ricky, Sep 26, 2018
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  14. Bigrod

    Bigrod Captain
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    I saw straight through it, when the term ‘innocent’ tourist was employed! ;)
     
    #14 Bigrod, Sep 26, 2018
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  15. Captain Black Adder

    Captain Black Adder Fringe Player

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    Hilariously close to the truth
     
    #15 Captain Black Adder, Sep 26, 2018
    Interested Bystander and bantamlad92 like this.
  16. Solentbantam

    Solentbantam Impact Sub
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    You may laugh but this will be written up as gospel in the Mail tomorrow.
     
    #16 Solentbantam, Sep 26, 2018
    Keefly Bantam, Utters0, jpaul81 and 5 others like this.
  17. River_City_Bantam

    River_City_Bantam Squad Player
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    In this world where some officials can speak, with a straight face even, of alternative facts and different truths, who knows? Perhaps IB isn't pulling our legs after all! That is the reality, and we are all just characters wittering on in some sleeper's dream-world.

    RCB
     
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    #17 River_City_Bantam, Sep 26, 2018
    Utters0, Interested Bystander and Hulmebantam like this.
  18. Dennis

    Dennis Captain
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    What's the German for 'whoosh'? ;)
     
    #18 Dennis, Sep 26, 2018
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  19. Captain Black Adder

    Captain Black Adder Fringe Player

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    You double bluffing? Nobody could read that as true....surely?
     
    #19 Captain Black Adder, Sep 26, 2018
    jpaul81, Interested Bystander, Stoneski and 2 others like this.
  20. zico

    zico Squad Player
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    Woosch?
     
    #20 zico, Sep 26, 2018
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